All of us sometimes feel like Arthur Dent felt on the day Earth was destroyed by the Vogons to make way for a space highway through the Galaxy, in Douglas Adams’ Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. A few days ago it was my turn to feel so, albeit for a very short time, thankfully. I happened to read that a patient plunged in coma from several days had sprung out of it when he smelt his favorite food! I had pooh-poohed it then, but I was about to experience something quite close!
One fine day, uh oh… I mean one not so fine a day, I woke up with a weird feeling. I can’t describe the feeling in words, except by giving a simile. It was exactly the feeling you’d experience if you slept in your house and woke up in the forest. Like you stepped into the elevator of your office, waited till it climbed up to your floor, and suddenly the door opened onto a deserted beach. Ok… not so dramatic, but almost :)
It was a strange morning, and I knew it the moment my sleep broke. It was (supposed to be) a cold December day, but unlike every other day, there was no cold mist, no feeling of freshness that accompanies you once you chase away the sleep hangover. And it just didn’t feel right. While I still lay on the bed, I noticed momentarily that it was all too quiet, and the very next moment I realized I was noticing the absence of the chirping of early morning birds, and the predictable drone of school vans. What was wrong with the environment?
Don’t worry I’m not going to end this article by saying my mom shook me up and I realized I had been dreaming. Nope, this was for real. Very real. I looked at the clock on the table beside my bed. It showed 11.30. I realized with a lazy groan that it had run out of battery a week ago. So what was the damned time? And what was wrong with the Earth?I intensely felt I had overslept a great deal. But why? The previous day hadn’t been all that exhausting. Expecting it to be quite late in the morning, I got up from my bed, walked over to the window and glanced across the road, half expecting small green men with onion eyes to be walking around. But no, it wasn’t unrealistically unreal. It was just… realistically unreal! I mean, where were the schoolchildren? Where were the joggers? Where were the elderly thieves that stole flowers from our garden every morning on the pretext of performing Pooja? What was wrong with the society?
And what was the matter with the lawn? What? No newspaper? Was the previous day a public holiday? How would I get through the day without a newspaper? Hmmm… and why hadn’t I heard the milkman’s call? That was loud enough to wake the dead. What was wrong with… with everything?
Hmmm, the time should be about 8 or 9, I reckoned. As I walked on towards the sitting room wondering why my mouth felt like some angel had brushed my teeth while I was asleep, the clock in the sitting room suddenly struck 5. Eh? I looked at it with disbelief. Now what was wrong with space and time itself?I earnestly tried to fit the pieces of the puzzle. Just then I smelt coffee, and my emotions went something like: Coffee. Coffee? Coffee! Of course, coffee!
In a moment, my nose had told me everything that all my other senses could not! Mom never made coffee in the mornings. Coffee was conventionally an evening drink at my place. Like a person who hit upon the ultimate truth of life when struck by a streak of lightning, I suddenly realized why the morning felt weird; because it wasn’t morning at all! I had just woken up from an afternoon nap. I smiled, and stepped into the kitchen for the coffee. Come on, what was wrong with me?! The Universe was alright!
Then on, my respect for the olfactory powers has greatly risen! Nowadays I opine that coffee vending machines should be an integral part of the ICU ward of every hospital.
